Transplantation takes care

I haven't written for the last month as I wanted to concentrate on issues close to home and telling the world about my problems is too public. My social media interactions are already being monitored by well-meaning but misinformed people who would love to twist my every post. At the least, I hope I've been entertaining for them. At worst, boring, so they'll stop.

Life. It's finally going somewhere. That first somewhere is Italy.

The Major and I had thought about a trip to Rome to see his oldest son graduate from a university there before the planned wedding in June. As those plans were drastically changed , we've decided to make it a honeymoon instead! Very soon, we'll be on a plane crossing the Atlantic and I'm excited-scared-giddy-worried. The closest I've been to out of country is Montreal, Canada, and the island of Barbados. Not exactly foreign. In Montreal, I was alone at a conference, and though it's a great place, it's not quite as fun without someone to share the experience of travel. My ex and I went to Barbados for our honeymoon but he got the flu the night before we flew out and stayed in the room most of the time. I saw the beauty of the ocean for the first time in my life while he languished in the hotel. I spent the majority of the trip, once again, alone.

THIS time, the Major and I will be seeing Rome, Ferrara, Venice and Florence together. Super romantic! I'll save you the mush-talk, though I may post a few pics later. Not THOSE kinds of pics. Sick people.

The second somewhere is DisneyWorld!

We had promised the boys a return trip there that they could actually remember. The last time, we went with my ex, sisters and parents and bro-in-law just before my dad died of pancreatic cancer. It was a disaster at first with the airline misplacing my dad's luggage with his chemo meds in it, late and missed flights because of storms that morning and every single person in our group getting airsick and puking from turbulence. But it ended on a beautiful note. My Daddy-O, determined to have a great time, wanted to ride every single ride he could. And he DID, saying, "I already know what will kill me. I might as well have fun!" The sound of his laughter and cheering on that crazy roller coaster still rings in my ears.

The third somewhere, ultimately, is Okinawa.

As some of you might know, we've had a bit of custody issue on whether the boys can go with us. In the midst of all the moving and paperwork required for the military plus me having hernia surgery, we've been going to court. Their wishes were that they WANT to go, so the judge is at least honoring those wishes; allowing them with us the first semester of school and we'll revisit the case when we come back at Christmas. Here's where I'm supposed to stay quiet about all of it, though I'd love to clear the air of some misconceptions old friends seem to have but haven't bothered to ask me directly about. Just know the Major and I will be keeping all the promises we made from the beginning to have the boys keep in touch with their family and friends here.

So until the move itself next month, we're planning for some fun times first. Lots of love and laughter together as a little family, wishing the Major's boys could be with us too. It's time to move forward in life. To grow and change together and not stagnate. Roses may have thorns but they deserve lots of sunshine.

What's love got to do with it?

*Warning: you may be offended

I cried today. A happy cry because of all the love in my life and a bittersweet cry bemoaning that I couldn't share that kind of love years ago. But that's silly. I had that kind of love but didn't know how to show it or return it and neither could the person I loved. So an impasse came and went. And we are now stronger for it as we learned how to break free from the constraints of miscommunication and are able to show others who communicate the way we do just what love means to us.

And I cried after the following video. I'll share with you why first. Because I want you to listen to this woman's every.single.word. Absorb them, hear them, understand them. Regardless of who is saying them to whomever.

Because these words ring true for every human being on earth, those who love and love deeply, no matter the skin color, gender or creed. There are those who would say the love of one person to another is unnatural, just because those two people have the same parts. But take away the sexual organs and you're still left with beating hearts that speed up with fear and love, slow down with comfort and rest. Souls that are still shiny under the smudge of years. Human thoughts that were innocent as children, jaded as teens, growing still as adults. We are all left with the same things in death. The pharmaceutical world would have us use our parts into old age but really, these vaginas, breasts, penises, parts are not our entirety.

And our entirety deserves love.

Thank you immalittlestrange and B for bringing this artist to my attention.

For 50 years, you were my favorite poem 

And I’d read you every night, knowing I might never understand every word 

But that was okay because the lines of you were the closest thing to holy I’d ever heard. 

You’d say, “This kind of love HAS to be a verb.”

I can only pray we live for another 50 years to enjoy each other like this. 

Mama bear don't play that!

NOTICE: I've had it with bullies.

Those bigger asswipes who pick on people smaller than them because they think size will protect them, either thru intimidation or sheer force.
Those smaller Napoleon weenies who, like rabid, snarling poodles try to push others around, regardless of size because they have something to prove.

Well, guess what you little pricks? This little mama may be small but dynamite comes in small packages and I WILL NOT let my kids be victims. Yes, I KNOW violence isn't the answer and turning the other cheek is the best thing to do. However, my children shouldn't have to constantly deal with humiliation, fear or kicks to self confidence. They WILL be taught to stand up for themselves. They already stand up for other kids who are bullied but they don't think it's a big deal when others do it to them. I should be proud of that, knowing my boys are being raised well. But a part of me, that Lindsey demon, is growling and snarling herself and I'm about to let her loose.

Earlier today, a kid swatted at my kidlet who's 11, tall and broad for his age. He takes after his dad in more than size: he's also a gentle giant. He champions others and keeps his own hurts to himself. He told the kid, who happened to be smaller, to knock it off. The jerk then fake juked a punch to my son's face then punched him in the stomach. Unprovoked. (If you know my son, you know this is true and not just a mom turning a blind eye. And there were witnesses.) My kidlet didn't hit back but did have the wind knocked out of him and told the principal his side of the story. Little jerk talked to the principal too but didn't get punished. WHAAAA???

Oh, it is ON.

My son had the same problem with a jerk on his baseball team who was favored by the coach as well. That kid spread some terrible and hurtful rumors about the kidlet as well as spit at him and threw baseballs at his face. The kidlet turned away each time, ignoring the taunts but I KNOW it got to him. How do I know? Because another kid told me about how he would hear my kidlet put himself down under his breath during drills, repeating the same hurtful things the jerk had told him. (commence breakage of mommy's heart)

When I confronted the coaches, I was told "boys will be boys" and despite a no tolerance policy, the kid wasn't forced to sit on the bench, as I was told would happen. MY kid sat instead. Of course, I knew where the jerk got his attitude. His mother was a first-class headcase herself and fond of spreading her own brand of meanness. Some people never grow up.

During a big tournament where my kidlet was needed but still sat sideline, I asked the coach again why the other kid was still playing after his actions continued. I was the one ridiculed, (by the coach!) my parenting skills questioned. Mama don't play that! I immediately pulled my son from the team and let it be known loudly neither he NOR his brother would ever play for that coach again. Despite my ex-husband knowing him for many years and being an assistant coach for the same team. The team fell apart after that and good riddance to bad rubbish. Do I regret my actions? NO. Because I stood up for my son when he needed me most.

This next bully better watch it or he'll find himself in a world of hurt. My claws are being sharpened as we speak and the kidlet is about to learn tae kwon do moves from the Major.

God bless the family of a little boy in Stillwater who took his own life in front of students this morning because of bullies. Rest in Peace, Cade.

Clearing the Air

Just going to leave this right here for your perusal:

It always amazes me what people will gossip about. Some terribly funny gossip about me came back this morning and I had a hearty laugh about it. Because it's all false. Not even a lick of truth to it. I'm not going to repeat it here or anywhere else because frankly, it would be repeated with a new twist, I'm sure. On one hand, it sends traffic to my Facebook and to this blog. On the other, it makes those spreading the rumors look silly and completely unprofessional.

To dispel the rumors though, this is what I do: I am a social media consultant and strategist. I help manage social media sites, websites and blogs for different companies as a freelance consultant. I write press releases, promote various events and products and write blogs. I'm not doing anything questionable nor shameful. I am in control of myself and a professional at all times. My discipline involves the hard work I do for others; my fetish, the written word.

So people, knock it off. My respect for you has dropped several notches. If you want to continue to be rumor-mongers, go right ahead. It neither hurts my credibility nor the companies I work for. If anything, it makes them and me more popular.

Silly, silly people.