Objects in mirror are not what they appear

Holy cow, what a summer. And what a glorious life I'm living. Yes, I'm going to brag just a little. It's healthy to be happy, dammit!

We've all made it to Okinawa after a July from hell where I nearly die from a diseased gallbladder and abscesses, where the Major flies back on emergency leave to literally save my life by helping me stabilize enough to get out of ICU, and then help me hobble around with a stomach stent in my chest to drain out the infection. (Bleargh). After we survive August with a horrendous flight from Seattle to Okinawa in a cramped and screaming-baby-filled airplane for 18 cruel hours. Though the boys liked Seattle and we spent some amazing time with friends Ken and Kelly and Heather! (Thanks for the hospitality, lovelies!) I showed the boys all my favorite places and they still talk about it.

We are here and loving it! The boys are able to talk to their family back in Oklahoma almost every day and I'm glad of it. (Thank you, Facetime and Vonage!) They are doing well here though there are adjustments. The oldest is in a more challenging school and though a middle schooler, is taking two high school level classes. He puts a lot of stress on himself, unfortunately, and is too much like his mama in being the perfectionist. Being with friends is helping him though. SOOO much better than last year when he struggled to fit in and couldn't make friends.

The youngest has taken to the place like he's never lived anywhere else. It's amazing to me. He's grown two inches and gained at least five pounds on his skinny frame. He's now reading books like the Harry Potter series and I can barely get him inside until it's dark outside. A group of boys his age keeps him busy.

The house is nearly unpacked after three weeks. I can't believe how well it's coming along! I'm so OCD about it and want it done two weeks ago but it's not realistic. I'll be lucky to get pictures up in three weeks and I'm almost okay with that.

I just want it to feel like home. For me, for the Major, for the boys. And we've almost succeeded.

For me, I'm keeping a positive attitude. There are those who criticize, who've called me selfish, mean and can't understand "why I would take the boys away from their family and friends." Sorry, but it's an opportunity for them to grow outside that small-town mentality. To see the world and the people in it. To have their eyes opened but still have roots. Because they deserve to see the beauty of the world and LIVE it, not just visit it.

I'm keeping it positive for myself as well. There are too many horror stories of spouses who never leave base in their egocentricity. Who mock and demean everything different about their host country, simply because it isn't like home. Isn't like America. Isn't like their rose-colored vision of small town USA. I've found amazing people here.

This is an actual sunset I saw on Sunday at Araha Beach, Okinawa. ©

Seen the most gorgeous sunsets I could imagine. Learned to drive on the opposite (NOT the wrong-) side of the street in a tiny car down streets I can't pronounce much less read the letters to which make up their names. I've felt a sense of accomplishment, of growth, of expansion into a greater self. And I was scared shitless the whole time. No, really. I got a stomach-ache later that day from venturing out into unknown traffic, buying produce in a store where no one spoke English using strange currency, and still managed to make it home.

Only once have I broken down, sobbing, missing my friends and family more than I could bare. Watching my nieces and nephew grow from so far away is hard. I can't just go to my mom or my best friends and have a hug because I need it. And I'm not good enough friends with folks here to do that. I've been so busy setting up house and running around with the family, I've lost more weight. I don't recognize myself as the chubby bunny anymore and it's weird. I have a bit of homesickness but it isn't something to dwell on. It's natural and I get melancholy sometimes. (Meg knows what I mean.) I have the most amazing friends and I just remember that I'm adding to that bunch. The spouses group here is so fun and I'm learning the lingo. The Air Force Ball, which I FINALLY get to go to!, is this Saturday. And I'm going to have a grand time with my love. I'm keeping this face because the mask is off.

I'm happy and nothing can break me down. 

Home, sweet, homey

My internet has been shoddy the last couple of days so when it's working, I'm working. No time to write for myself though the Blogger app works well enough.

Recouping from Seattle and still haven't downloading those bazillion pictures yet. However, I've managed to get the house in usable order again and we're decorating for Halloween! The Major's birthday is right around the holiday and he usually does a big party. He didn't get to last year so this year we're doing it out right! You should see the bags and bags of decorations. There are skulls and spider webs and candles everywhere and it's set to be glamorous spooky. Think Addams Family.

We also had a duct cleaning service come out today to clean out the vents and all I can say is GROSS! More than 2 gallons  (7.57 litres) of dust, dirt and grime. Blech! But at least it'll be cleaner for us and our guests.

Speaking of things I wanted to get done, I've pretty much finished the window seat dressings, as promised. Want to see?? Simply wrapped old pillows in the fabric and tucked it in. Reversible fabric is my friend!

Window #1 

Window #2

This fabric was used in BOTH windows!
It's reversible and the colors blend with either room.

I know. You're thrilled. :) I love decorating our house and making it a home. Love to the readers and hi to new folks in South Africa!

Sleepless in Seattle - living a chick flick

What an absolutely amazing trip! Seattle is everything I thought it would be and more. The Major and I really needed this trip to unwind, reconnect with friends and enjoy time together just exploring. It's best to just see some of the more than 600 pics we took instead of telling you about everything we did. And we did ALL the things! Click on them to enlarge. (All photos taken by me unless expressly credited. Please do not steal and repost as your own!) :)

Mt. Rainer greeting us from the plane.

The flower market at Pike's Place.

HUGE variety of veggies/fruits

Chinese musician

We rode the Duck! (It's a bus that turns into a boat.)

My favorite store - Bella Umbrella had 100s of different
umbrellas for every occasion. 

The Major bought me this one. 

Amazing apple butter date pastry from
the Dahlia Bakery.

It's an ad agency! Rubber chickens &
indoor 9 hole golf course included.

The notorious nasty Gum Wall. EW

One of the largest ferris wheels in the world.

A traditional fall shot of the Space Needle.

Our hotel. I suggest the suite. 

An afternoon well spent with friends - photo HDRossfeld

See? Well spent. photo HDRossfeld

The slugs are enormous in the PNW!

Our Jack Skellington creation!

Seattle art rocks! Giant lamppost 

Humility can be a bitch with a big stick

I haven't felt terribly generous of late.

My time, at least according to me, is too precious to be given to just anyone. Especially when it comes to my loved ones. My boyfriend's (The Major) son is in town visiting and I understand all too well his need to have alone time with him, since he never gets to see him. Unfortunately, his ex-wife also lives here and wanted to see him before she moves back to her home country.

Now, don't get me wrong. She's a lovely person and was his stepmother for 11 years, most of his childhood. There's no telling when she might see him again once she moves. I was quite upset, however, to realize she wanted that precious timeslot allotted to ME in which to meet him with The Major. I already had rearranged my schedule for this dinner, prepared myself mentally to welcome someone else into my life and hoping to be accepted into his. I'm the one who has to make concessions, because she is still a very important person in their lives.

Cue Lindsey.

"Lindsey" is someone we've named as my green-eyed inner demon. She's the worst part of me I keep caged and for good reason. This monster can be the most vicious, conniving and petty sliver of non-humanity known. She bites with words, snapping and snarling, when I don't get my way. She can't strike out physically, just emotionally and mentally against others, leaving far deeper scars. And she serves only me. My selfish little beastie.

Lindsey ranted and raved in private; whimpered and pouted. Narrowed her eyes against the world and threw far too many verbal bombs than is necessary.

Then an email came in from a client who just returned from a trip with her husband. I leave out her name as kindnesses should be felt, not named. But thank you, MB, for holding up that harsh glaring mirror.

Her story: When I was in Seattle last week, I was taking pictures in a very quaint area called Pioneer Square Park.  There was a homeless man about my age at Pioneer Square that was sitting on a park bench.  He saw what I was doing with the iPad and asked "Is that a camera?"  I said that it was and took a picture of him and showed it to him.  He asked if I could send it to him for his daughter's birthday this week.  He didn't have email, so he gave me a card that showed his name and that he was staying at Lazarus Day Center (which is why I gather he's homeless or in rehab or something).  I wasn't able to print it and mail it because of our Internet problems (since the printer was wireless) and I was beside myself, so I called a FedEx Kinko's up there and I explained the situation and asked if I could upload the photo, have them print two copies on glossy photo paper and have them deliver them to him.  The very patient young gal I talked to through my tear said yes, I could email it to her.  I asked if she wanted to take my credit card info over the phone.  She said "This one's on me and I'll walk it over there to him at the Lazarus Day Center on my lunch hour.  Hope you had a great time in Seattle."  There are truly good people in this world."


So why tell this story? Because that one paragraph was Humility herself beating back the jealous little demon. Showing me that kind people take time out of their lives to do things for other people they don't know or should even care about.

Humility carried a freaking big stick and Lindsey is, for now, subdued, black and blue. I may not get to spend those few precious hours with The Major and his son yet. But I need to remember I'll be part of their lives forever.

I've already won the largest prize at the fair. Let someone else have the tin whistle.

Update: Surprise dinner with The Major and son tonight. Sometimes, patience really is a virtue.