The dog says "Meh."

 For anyone who knows the Major, you've probably seen his Facebook and the jokes he made over two weeks of being TDY in Guam about being made the king there. And his demand for minions. Lots of them.

Did you know The Minions from Despicable Me are getting their own movie??

I've made it a habit, whenever he comes in by commercial jet (since I can't get on base yet) or when he walks in the door to greet him with a funny sign. Sure, it's cheesy but everyone should feel welcomed. As some of his crew walked passed me, they got a good chuckle as well.

Once kicked off the island, the other minions ran for it. Cowards!

It's not royal fanfare, but it did the job.

I snickered as I posted the next picture, slightly modified:

All Hail the Conquering Hero!  

After unpacking some things, showing me gifts he acquired from adoring islanders (gift shops are classic for this), jet lag began to set in. All was quiet during naptime when I hear the sound of a plastic bag being dragged around the living room. Our 60 lb Rhodesian Ridgeback "puppy"decided to have a snack of the Major's things left on the coffee table! It was a trail of destruction from the front room to the back yard. Money scattered on the back porch, completely demolished credit cards, military ID and driver's license and a gnawed strip of leather which use to be his wallet. The watch was farther back in the yard, and luckily only needs a new strap. Sparky ran for the hills when I started hollering at him, my flipflop wielded above my head as I chased him. 

He's still contrite this morning.

Photo stolen. I think I'll be forgiven.

So welcome home! Everyone loves you... except the dog, it seems.

Dali Dolly

Now he's gone. Left at 0600 this morning. I got up with him to help last minute prep and even made a few dozen cookies for his crew. As soon as the door closed, I had a proper boo hoo, went back to sleep for a few hours and now I don't feel like doing anything. Nothing. Nada. Zilch.

It's nearly noon, I'm still in my pjs and I haven't eaten or even had my coffee. For those who know my fiendish appetite for a good cuppa, this isn't good. I'll get over this, I know. And that's okay. I need a day to rcoup, think about things to do in the meantime. Thankfully, I'll have my kids for a few days and we're going to the zoo tomorrow. And flag football starts for the youngest so I'll be busy with them a few days of the week.

I've decided the next two weeks are going to be busy (after I get my tuckus in gear.) There's still so much to do with this house to make it truly comfortable and a home. We hung some pictures last weekend but it isn't enough.

So my Major is Gone, Suck it Up! To-Do List:

1. Exercise every day. Build a better habit of it.
2. Organize the office files better. Consolidate, shred and otherwise get this crap cleaned up.
3. Make lovely, comfy window seats for the upstairs guest bed and the office. (This one has long been on my list since there's already a bench in each large window.) Some pillows, new window coverings and a padded seat will make it simply awesome. I want them to be gathering places for folks!
4. Hang more pictures! Throughout the house, the boys room especially.
5. Get the new shades installed in their room. It'll help with the electric bills and look SO much nicer in there. Wish I could repaint and take down the awful border in there. It'll be awhile.
6. Learn to cook something new, a dish I've never made before.
7. Unpack and sort some more boxes out of the garage.

Sure. All these things are rather ambitious for two weeks time but it'll keep my mind busy and my hands more so. After all, time is on my side.

Clearing the Air

Just going to leave this right here for your perusal:

It always amazes me what people will gossip about. Some terribly funny gossip about me came back this morning and I had a hearty laugh about it. Because it's all false. Not even a lick of truth to it. I'm not going to repeat it here or anywhere else because frankly, it would be repeated with a new twist, I'm sure. On one hand, it sends traffic to my Facebook and to this blog. On the other, it makes those spreading the rumors look silly and completely unprofessional.

To dispel the rumors though, this is what I do: I am a social media consultant and strategist. I help manage social media sites, websites and blogs for different companies as a freelance consultant. I write press releases, promote various events and products and write blogs. I'm not doing anything questionable nor shameful. I am in control of myself and a professional at all times. My discipline involves the hard work I do for others; my fetish, the written word.

So people, knock it off. My respect for you has dropped several notches. If you want to continue to be rumor-mongers, go right ahead. It neither hurts my credibility nor the companies I work for. If anything, it makes them and me more popular.

Silly, silly people.