Objects in mirror are not what they appear

Holy cow, what a summer. And what a glorious life I'm living. Yes, I'm going to brag just a little. It's healthy to be happy, dammit!

We've all made it to Okinawa after a July from hell where I nearly die from a diseased gallbladder and abscesses, where the Major flies back on emergency leave to literally save my life by helping me stabilize enough to get out of ICU, and then help me hobble around with a stomach stent in my chest to drain out the infection. (Bleargh). After we survive August with a horrendous flight from Seattle to Okinawa in a cramped and screaming-baby-filled airplane for 18 cruel hours. Though the boys liked Seattle and we spent some amazing time with friends Ken and Kelly and Heather! (Thanks for the hospitality, lovelies!) I showed the boys all my favorite places and they still talk about it.

We are here and loving it! The boys are able to talk to their family back in Oklahoma almost every day and I'm glad of it. (Thank you, Facetime and Vonage!) They are doing well here though there are adjustments. The oldest is in a more challenging school and though a middle schooler, is taking two high school level classes. He puts a lot of stress on himself, unfortunately, and is too much like his mama in being the perfectionist. Being with friends is helping him though. SOOO much better than last year when he struggled to fit in and couldn't make friends.

The youngest has taken to the place like he's never lived anywhere else. It's amazing to me. He's grown two inches and gained at least five pounds on his skinny frame. He's now reading books like the Harry Potter series and I can barely get him inside until it's dark outside. A group of boys his age keeps him busy.

The house is nearly unpacked after three weeks. I can't believe how well it's coming along! I'm so OCD about it and want it done two weeks ago but it's not realistic. I'll be lucky to get pictures up in three weeks and I'm almost okay with that.

I just want it to feel like home. For me, for the Major, for the boys. And we've almost succeeded.

For me, I'm keeping a positive attitude. There are those who criticize, who've called me selfish, mean and can't understand "why I would take the boys away from their family and friends." Sorry, but it's an opportunity for them to grow outside that small-town mentality. To see the world and the people in it. To have their eyes opened but still have roots. Because they deserve to see the beauty of the world and LIVE it, not just visit it.

I'm keeping it positive for myself as well. There are too many horror stories of spouses who never leave base in their egocentricity. Who mock and demean everything different about their host country, simply because it isn't like home. Isn't like America. Isn't like their rose-colored vision of small town USA. I've found amazing people here.

This is an actual sunset I saw on Sunday at Araha Beach, Okinawa. ©

Seen the most gorgeous sunsets I could imagine. Learned to drive on the opposite (NOT the wrong-) side of the street in a tiny car down streets I can't pronounce much less read the letters to which make up their names. I've felt a sense of accomplishment, of growth, of expansion into a greater self. And I was scared shitless the whole time. No, really. I got a stomach-ache later that day from venturing out into unknown traffic, buying produce in a store where no one spoke English using strange currency, and still managed to make it home.

Only once have I broken down, sobbing, missing my friends and family more than I could bare. Watching my nieces and nephew grow from so far away is hard. I can't just go to my mom or my best friends and have a hug because I need it. And I'm not good enough friends with folks here to do that. I've been so busy setting up house and running around with the family, I've lost more weight. I don't recognize myself as the chubby bunny anymore and it's weird. I have a bit of homesickness but it isn't something to dwell on. It's natural and I get melancholy sometimes. (Meg knows what I mean.) I have the most amazing friends and I just remember that I'm adding to that bunch. The spouses group here is so fun and I'm learning the lingo. The Air Force Ball, which I FINALLY get to go to!, is this Saturday. And I'm going to have a grand time with my love. I'm keeping this face because the mask is off.

I'm happy and nothing can break me down. 

Summer of Love, part 2

Coming home from Italy was stunning. I wanted to move everyone I love there with me and stay for the rest of my life. I'd get the language books and CDs and become fluent and have the best prosciutto and pecorino Romano every day with fresh olive oil. But the summer needed to move on. We have lots to do in a few months!

With a only a few days to wash clothes and repack plus get the boys packed for the next adventure, I concentrated on the tasks at hand. Then it was OFF to DISNEYWORLD and Universal Studios!! The last time was five years ago when my dad was dying of cancer but some incredibly generous souls from church and friends had gathered enough funds to send Maman, Daddy-O, our family and my sisters and bro-in-law to that wonderful, magical playland. Daddy-O rode every ride he could because as he said, "I already know what will kill me. Might as well have fun!" The boys were very small, 2 and 6, and don't remember that much so the Major and I had promised them we would be taking them back. This would be our Kid Honeymoon, a way to solidify us as a family unit before our move across the ocean.

The boys were nervous getting on the airplane but they calmed down a bit after the ride started. We didn't get into Florida until late since we didn't leave until the afternoon and nerves were running high. Arewethereyet syndrome. We stayed at the Coronado Springs resort on property and it was well worth it. Early bird and late owl hours were available to us at any of the parks and we had incredible service. We spent three days at Universal Studios and four at Disney. Yay, military discounts! Only sad point of the trip was the Oldest hurting his ankle and having to be in a wheelchair for most of the trip, hobbling around. But bright spot meant we got to the front of the line!

Harry Potter ride at Universal was probably one of the best rides we've ever seen! This was in the waiting area and the pictures conversed with each other. Definitely try the Butter Beer. SOOO tasty.

Our hotel, Coronado Springs on it's own little lake. Great waterfall swimming pool too!

Jurassic Park! My dad would have loved this. The ride was fun and the kids got to explore the exhibits.

The Major got to be in a movie! This ride at Universal was set up to take people as actors, make the worst B-movie possible and act as a ride at the same time! Yours truly even got to add her scream of terror!

Most wonderful Lego Store! Giant store with every color, size and shape you can imagine at Downtown Disney Marketplace. Tubs were available to play on boards set up around the store. A barefoot parent's nightmare.

The best way to watch a Disney parade is from the shoulders of a strong man.

The amazing dining room of the new Beast's Castle. The windows were digitally mastered to look like falling snow. The cherubs on the ceiling were pics of actual babies of the engineers who built it. The trick to getting in there is walking up and asking if anyone dropped their reservation. We got in immediately and were even offered specials because of the Kid Honeymoon. Wonderful French cuisine. SOOO worth it.

We WOULD have to pick a trip during Star Wars Weekend. Thousands of extra visitors to Disney Hollywood Studios flock to the park to see reenactments, actors from the movies and animated series and dress up in costume. It's like ComicCon for LucasFreaks. We LOVED it. The boys went to Jedi training school and fought some of the Clone Wars characters! We have tons of pics of those. 

Much of the first part of the trip was spent in the rain as Hurricane Andrea hit Florida. That just meant shorter lines for us and cooler temperatures. We had umbrellas and ponchos and survived by running in the rain and laughing about it. :)

Of course, Star Wars Weekend participation included making our own droids! From left to right: Major's, mine, Youngest and Oldest. You could mix and match legs, heads, bodies, and hats! 

The light and fireworks shows at all the parks were just spectacular. We stayed to watch the Magic Kingdom show twice. It was that good. 

The T-Rex Cafe in Downtown Disney was booked for months out. On a whim after a very wet day, I walked up to the desk, asked if there was a table for four anywhere in the restaurant and we got in within 5 minutes! A-Maz-ING! Definitely try to get in here if you can. Every 15 minutes the entire place saw an asteroid shower and the animatronic dinosaurs all over the place roared! The food was awesome too!

Despite several years of working for Disney and visits to both DisneyWorld and Disneyland, this is the only time I've gotten a picture with the main character. We went to the Lilo and Stitch breakfast Luau at the Polynesian Resort.
Love the Mouse!

We closed out every park we went to every night. Which meant sometimes staying up until 2 am to see everything.

The Major loves us. :) Special package ready for us upon hotel entry. He put so much thought into it!

The trip was so much about the food too. Every day was centered around the places we would eat as well as the rides. This was the crabcakes at Captain Jack's. God, I was stuffed. 

Viva l'Italia! - Summer of Love part One

What a whirlwind summer! We've been everywhere and doing everything to go on honeymoon, go on kid honeymoon, move to Okinawa, etc, and I've barely sat at the computer!

Italy now ranks as my Number ONE place to go. At once beautiful, serene, colorful, and passionate, it's no wonder it boasts as the most romantic country to visit. I had a little bit of a problem getting started thinking about Italy because in early May, after some stomach issues which have plagued me for most likely years, I had hernia surgery. I'll spare you the details but it's rather weird to feel your intestinal wall as bumps in your skin! Mesh is keeping it all in now, though backpacking thru Italy was rather difficult with the weight restriction of 10 lbs or less. Seeing the Major's oldest graduate in a small ceremony overlooking Rome, visiting sites I'd only dreamed about in my Latin classes, being waylaid by gypsies in train terminals. It was truly the most amazing and gorgeous honeymoon a girl could want. I can really only show you in pictures. And these don't even do it justice. All were taken with an Android cell phone and no editing by me. (Copyright.)
Our itinerary:
Rome for three days
Train to Ferrara for one day
Train to Venice for three
Train to Florence on the way back to Rome

A very happy featherann eating a snack before catching a train. I got good at
asking for items and paying for them. Though the Major speaking Italian helped.

The teaming Tiber River in Rome. It'd been warm and rainier than usual so the algae was up. But it made for such a beautiful picture! Our bus tour of the city was worth it.

One of my favorite shots of the Rialto Bridge in Venice. Off to the right of the bridge, where those poles are, is a little unused gondola stand. We had the most romantic picnic there with items we hand selected from the little grocery store topped off by a Chianti and chocolate. Magical!

Pigeons and seagulls were everywhere! This was a funky little light just outside of San Marco's Square in Venice.

The Pieta. What more could I say? I sobbed in a corner alone upon seeing it, so struck was I by it's simplicity and realism. As if Mary were indeed there in front of me, crying for her Son.

The romance of a gondola ride. Even better to see it cross under the windows of Marco Polo's house! I'll be enlarging this to hang in our home. Our ride was late at night so there was no one on the canal. Truly private and romantic beyond words. The Major outdid himself. 

Nothing to see here...but the POPE! Conducting a special service which we didn't know about as we climbed into the top of St. Peter's Basilica (you can go all the way to the top!) We were very surprised to see this while in the upper dome.

Darling little girls of Ferrara, a medieval and wonderful town with the best little bar around, XI Comandemento. Tell Tommy that Gonzo sends his love.  

Every little church we visited was ornate, beautiful and colorful. Truly works of art.

Florence was artsy and gorgeous and funky door knockers were on every house, each unique. I took 20 pics of them!

When in Italy, one MUST have authentic gelato. I ate my weight in it thruout the trip.

The Duomo, Florence. Ivory, Jade and pink marble covered every inch of this ancient church. Gorgeous!

One of the fashion capitols of the world so of COURSE I had to find shoes. These just happen to have removable lipstick too. Versatile!

By far MY favorite shot I took of our trip. It epitomizes everything about Italy I loved: the color, the vibrancy, the food, the romance. It was also my first view of Venice with the love of my life beside me. 

Thank You, Major. For loving me. 

Transplantation takes care

I haven't written for the last month as I wanted to concentrate on issues close to home and telling the world about my problems is too public. My social media interactions are already being monitored by well-meaning but misinformed people who would love to twist my every post. At the least, I hope I've been entertaining for them. At worst, boring, so they'll stop.

Life. It's finally going somewhere. That first somewhere is Italy.

The Major and I had thought about a trip to Rome to see his oldest son graduate from a university there before the planned wedding in June. As those plans were drastically changed , we've decided to make it a honeymoon instead! Very soon, we'll be on a plane crossing the Atlantic and I'm excited-scared-giddy-worried. The closest I've been to out of country is Montreal, Canada, and the island of Barbados. Not exactly foreign. In Montreal, I was alone at a conference, and though it's a great place, it's not quite as fun without someone to share the experience of travel. My ex and I went to Barbados for our honeymoon but he got the flu the night before we flew out and stayed in the room most of the time. I saw the beauty of the ocean for the first time in my life while he languished in the hotel. I spent the majority of the trip, once again, alone.

THIS time, the Major and I will be seeing Rome, Ferrara, Venice and Florence together. Super romantic! I'll save you the mush-talk, though I may post a few pics later. Not THOSE kinds of pics. Sick people.

The second somewhere is DisneyWorld!

We had promised the boys a return trip there that they could actually remember. The last time, we went with my ex, sisters and parents and bro-in-law just before my dad died of pancreatic cancer. It was a disaster at first with the airline misplacing my dad's luggage with his chemo meds in it, late and missed flights because of storms that morning and every single person in our group getting airsick and puking from turbulence. But it ended on a beautiful note. My Daddy-O, determined to have a great time, wanted to ride every single ride he could. And he DID, saying, "I already know what will kill me. I might as well have fun!" The sound of his laughter and cheering on that crazy roller coaster still rings in my ears.

The third somewhere, ultimately, is Okinawa.

As some of you might know, we've had a bit of custody issue on whether the boys can go with us. In the midst of all the moving and paperwork required for the military plus me having hernia surgery, we've been going to court. Their wishes were that they WANT to go, so the judge is at least honoring those wishes; allowing them with us the first semester of school and we'll revisit the case when we come back at Christmas. Here's where I'm supposed to stay quiet about all of it, though I'd love to clear the air of some misconceptions old friends seem to have but haven't bothered to ask me directly about. Just know the Major and I will be keeping all the promises we made from the beginning to have the boys keep in touch with their family and friends here.

So until the move itself next month, we're planning for some fun times first. Lots of love and laughter together as a little family, wishing the Major's boys could be with us too. It's time to move forward in life. To grow and change together and not stagnate. Roses may have thorns but they deserve lots of sunshine.

Happiness is Furious

What's to tell? I've been swamped physically and emotionally for the last month. So much going on I can't wrap my mind around some of it. All I can do is hope everything turns out for the best in the next couple of weeks and life will finally move forward. Ever had that feeling of limbo? Where one thing can't be done until this other thing is done first but then you have three other things that require that first thing? But I'll be damned if those three things don't require something of the second thing too. Yeah, swampy limbo.

At least the passports, both military and civilian travel, have been filed and I'm just waiting for them to arrive. The dog is up-to-date on shots and micro-chipped. All the medical histories have been collected and sent, ID cards, insurance and dependent care done.  Most of those were contingent on me getting my taxes done and THEN changing my name legally with both SSN and on my driver's license. Holy hell, that's a LOT of paperwork!! Thru the grace of God, I'm getting a little money back from last year since I basically lived below the poverty level. The majority of that will go to paying back some bills I accumulated during my last marriage. I hate owing.

Speaking of owing, I'm owed an apology from a few people but I have to try to forget that. Some people you just feel sorry for because their hatred is sadly misplaced. The mistruths they tell will come out in the end and it makes me sad. (Yes, I know I'm digressing from my usual happy, go-lucky but this last month has brought out the beast in me. The Major keeps me from baring my teeth too much, luckily.) A lot of my anxiety is self-imposed. I'm scared to death of living overseas. Of living in an unfamiliar environment and what happens if the Major is deployed while we're there? What happened to those friends I thought I'd have forever who suddenly don't have my back? Thank God we have base sponsors and there's a strong spouse's network. I keep reminding myself that I won't be alone, that I make friends easily and my will to be happy is stronger than my fear of the unknown. C'est la vie.

For now, I'm going to be #FuriouslyHappy. (<-- I wish I knew The Bloggess in person. We'd have lots of wine slushies, talk snark and pound the table in laughter.) Because the Universe can suck it when it tries to bring me down. I have love, wine and my family and friends. God evidently loves me because I have all of these in my life in abundance.

So neener, neener punkin' eater. No more whinin', ya big baby. This mama wants no more drama! But I do want glitter. LOTS of it. Plus jazz hands because the Universe better start doing a tap dance while I aim both barrels at its feet. I'm about to blow the lid off a can of whoop-ass.

Side-boob and cute doc- FTW!

I admit it. I'm a bit of a flirt. But I don't WANT people I flirt with, not sexually anyway. (Trust me, the Major keeps me quite happy, tyvm) I just do it as a joke, to make them feel good about themselves. Humans deserve to feel good and be confident. Human beings fascinate me to no end. I love all kinds of people. What makes us tick? What makes us smile? What makes us cringe? Admittedly, a few well placed words can either cause a smile, a blush or a withdrawal.

Yesterday, I made someone blush. Not really because I was trying. I was just being myself, which some find to be too forward and outspoken. Having three moles I was concerned about and a history of skin cancer in the family, I went to the base clinic. (Yay, socialized medicine!) The doctor who walked in was young, tall and handsome, which took me back a little. AND he was in a uniform. Sorry, but swoonage was in order. Capt. Herb was very nice and straightforward. As it was my first time in a base medical facility and I'm trying to learn the Major's sponsor number, acronyms and the million other terms the military uses, I was a bit nervous. "Welcome to the jungle," he said with a laugh. We bantered back and forth and I became more comfortable. Unfortunately for him, (or fortunately, depending on your point of view) two of the moles were under my left breast. Now, I know women who are very self conscious about visiting doctors. They would probably be mortified at showing where these moles were. This is silly. Hell, I had two very large baby boys and one of them decided I should be in labor for a full week before he made an appearance almost a month early. Doctors were all up in mah bidness for that, and also for complete reconstruction of my plumbing to even HAVE the second child and then after my hysterectomy. Plus I get regular waxings at a wonderful little place here. Shyness at this point is a moot issue. I think I earned the right to show a bit of skin and still look pretty good for my age. If a doctor will shy away from a little side-boob, he doesn't deserve to be a doctor.

As Nurse Kayona prepared the tools and pulled the curtain, I started stripping off my shirt and bra. I don't think she was prepared for my lack of modesty in a medical setting. Of course, I'm damn sexay in a surgical gown. *coughyeahrightcough* Capt. Herb removed the one on my back after an owowow painful lidocaine shot to the area. (Seriously, the deadening shots hurt worse than my tattoos!) Then I laid on my side so he could get to the other mole he could remove in- office. (The last one is actually a cyst to be dug out today and will require stitches. *sadpanda*) Pulling up my gown to show the area but cover my breast, it was difficult to keep the gown in place. So I said, "Screw it. I'm not that modest, you're a doctor and you'd better be able to handle seeing a boob." Off went the gown, blush went the captain. I guess there aren't a lot of women who will do that in front of him, except maybe his wife. (Sorry, ladies, he was taken.) But do you know what caused ME to be embarrassed? When he asked me to raise my left arm up above my head to stretch out the skin better. The first thing that crossed my mind was, "Oh god. Did I shave my armpits??" (yes.whew.)

Yeah, the weird things you think about when laying on a doctor's table. At least I got some pretty pink and yellow bandaids out of it. And a blush on a cute doctor.

The Sorting Hat

Why can't I just have a giant Sorting Hat like in Harry Potter that goes over the house and magically tells me where everything goes?
"These things in the Hufflepuff long term storage pile."
"These things in the Gryffindor immediate household goods pile."
"These in the Slytherin you-may-not-see-them-for-months-because-military-shipping pile."

My oldest son has one that the Major brought from DisneyWorld for him but it's not nearly big enough. This is a fairly large house and with four of us in it, we have too much stuff. My goal over the next couple of weeks is to pare it down much more. From furniture to pageant clothes, an iphone and old wedding ring, to a myriad of toys and collectibles I've never shown, I want these things GONE. Out of sight. Sold. Vanished. Most of the stuff in the house seems to be the Major's, minor packrat that he is. Only thing is, we USE everything we have. The six tubs of party goods will definitely need some readjusting. I can't bear to be without our Christmas stuff because the boys will be spending the holiday with their dad over the next three years. But I would still like to decorate our house on the island to feel like home until they leave.

https://www.militarykidsconnect.org/

And why can't there be a Sorting Hat to work thru feelings? As we work custody out with their dad, this is my hopeful plan. It's a readjustment for everyone. I can only hope the changes are helping my kids be more flexible and accepting, opening their minds to all the possibility that world travel opportunities have in store. There are fantastic resources out there and I'm implementing as many as I can to help them thru the transition. Military Kids Connect has a little avatar so younger kids can keep track of their travels with a stamp, coping skills for older kids and even Military 101 for newcomers to learn the lingo. I've been Googling like crazy finding sites for making moving easier. Frankly, some of these sites would probably help me too!

How about a Sorting Hat to go thru the bajillion things that have to be done before the move? Not to mention our trip to Europe in the big middle of it all! (Crap, I nearly forgot about that!) There aren't enough hours in the day to keep the house running somewhat smoothly and normally while also preparing for this worldwide change. Physically and emotionally, it'll be a challenge. You'll notice I'm refraining from negative connotations? I'm determined to be positive about this thru the long haul. After all, I'm moving somewhere exciting (lots of people who've been there before us RAVE about it!) and I'm doing this with my best friend and love and my boys by my side!

For now though, if you're friend or family and plan to come over, either excuse the mess or pitch in and help. Imma need a LOT of it. ;)

Wedding of the century (Part deux)

I promised an extension of Wedding of the century (Part 1) so read it first before reading more!

Still getting over the shock of being married again and having been part of the fantastic flashmob! It's all happened so fast and now I officially belong to the military after getting my ID card and signed away my life for insurance and other things. The following are the vows the Major and I wrote together. Feel free to laugh, cry, whatever. We sure did!

The Major directing festivities as always.

The party dancing on my arrival!

SARA:  Mawwage... Mawwage is wot bwings us toogevver tooday. [This got a big laugh from the audience.]

I apologize.  J and H have clearly seen the Princess Bride one too many times, and they insisted we had to start that way.  But, if you know these two well, then that sort of thing should come as no surprise, for J and H are a couple who clearly always find ways to have fun with everything that they do.  It was this common spirit of playfulness and fun that first attracted them to one another, finally leading up to this blessed day, a day on which we are all now privileged to witness and participate in a ceremony celebrating the public acknowledgment of the love that J and H have for each other.  And, by our presence here with them, we confirm that they, together, are loved by many others.  We have come to surround them as they stand before us, where J and H in essence now say, “Welcome to our marriage!  Welcome to the celebration!”

To demonstrate the depth of their feelings for one another, J and H have each chosen a poem that, for them, captures their feelings on this day.

(The Major quoted this to me.)

She Walks In Beauty

By:  Lord Byron

She walks in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that's best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes:
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

One shade the more, one ray the less,
Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
Or softly lightens o'er her face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet express,
How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

And on that cheek, and o'er that brow,
So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,
But tell of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
A heart whose love is innocent!

(I read this to him)
Sonnet 12 - Indeed this very love which is my boast
By:  Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Indeed this very love which is my boast,
And which, when rising up from breast to brow,
Doth crown me with a ruby large enow
To draw men's eyes and prove the inner cost,—
This love even, all my worth, to the uttermost,
I should not love withal, unless that thou
Hadst set me an example, shown me how,
When first thine earnest eyes with mine were crossed,
And love called love. And thus, I cannot speak
Of love even, as a good thing of my own:
Thy soul hath snatched up mine all faint and weak,
And placed it by thee on a golden throne,—
And that I love (O soul, we must be meek!)
Is by thee only, whom I love alone.

SARA:  And now, having poetically expressed the depths of their affection for one another, J and H will share the wedding vows that they have written together.
J: I promise to always clearly explain my expectations rather than forcing you to guess at them and then getting angry when you’ve guessed wrong.  Do you promise the same? 
H: I do.  I promise to be a dreamer who ACTS on those dreams and includes you in them.  Do you promise the same? 
J: I do.  I promise not to play the blame game or to keep score, even if I am totally winning.  Do you promise the same?
H: I do.  I promise to keep the peace in our home with honest and open communication, even when my claws want to come out.  Do you promise the same?
J:  I do.  I promise to defend you against the slings and arrows of others, even when you’re wrong.  Do you promise the same?
H: I do.  I promise to always be myself, even if that means growing and changing with you.  Do you promise the same? 
J:  I do.  I promise to give you the benefit of the doubt and always listen to your side of the story before I yell at you.  Do you promise the same?
H:  I do.  I promise not to let my butt get bigger than it is right now, because staying healthy and fit means living a longer lifetime with you.  Do you promise the same? 
J:  I do.  I promise to make you laugh every single day, whether intentionally or not.  Do you promise the same?
H:  I do.  I promise that when I’m really angry with you I will shut my mouth, count to as high a number as necessary until I’m calm, and then come back to talk things over with you when we’re both rational.  Do you promise the same? 
J:  I do.  I promise to do the things that neither of us wants to do, if you really don’t want to do it more than I don’t want to do it.  Do you promise the same? 
H:  I do.  I promise not to promise something and then do something completely different.  Do you promise the same?
J:  I do.  I promise to show you every single day that you are loved and appreciated.  Do you promise the same?
H:  I do.  I promise to always keep you pleasantly surprised, even when you outdo me!  Do you promise the same?
J:  I do.  I promise to resolve our differences in private and never in public or in front of the children.  Do you promise the same?
H:  I do.  I promise never to take you for granted.  Do you promise the same? 
J:  I do.  I promise never to make you read any of the Twilight novels or to see any of those awful movies, or any movies featuring emo vampires that sparkle like a My Little Pony.  Do you promise the same?
H: I definitely do!

SARA:  The rings please.  [Best Man / MoH produce the rings.]  

You have for each other these special rings – symbols that love is the most precious element in your life together. A ring has no beginning and no ending, symbolizing that the love between you will never cease. You place these rings upon each others fingers as a visible sign of your vows this day, making you husband and wife.  

J:  With this ring, I thee wed.

H:  With this ring, I thee wed.

SARA:  In the honesty and sincerity of what you have said and done here today, and in accordance with the laws of the state of Oklahoma, it is my honor and delight to declare you husband and wife.  You may now kiss the bride, and never ever stop.

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. & Mrs.!

Thank you everyone for joining us here today.  As everyone but Heather already knows, there will be a picnic reception immediately following the ceremony. So, let the wild rumpus start!

(Thanks to Brandi for these awesome shots!)

The Caged Bird Sings Happy Birthday

Today is my birthday. I'm not bashful in saying I'm two years shy of 40 and I look fabulous! This morning, the Major and the boys got up early, went to buy donuts for me and surprised me with breakfast in bed. Noms topped with birthday candles! We sat on the bed and ate the sugary deliciousness until it was time for school. The youngest had crawled into bed with me to snuggle for a few minutes alone first, telling me "Now you're 21!" He's been especially snuggly recently, what with all the craziness going on. I'll take what I can get as he'll soon be too big to want to be a snuggle bunny. :(

Tonight, we're celebrating and saying goodbye to good friends Sophia and Matt who are moving to San Fran. I still hope there's cake. Tomorrow, I get the BEST present I could possibly want though. I get to marry the man it seems I've waited forever for. Like everyone else led up to him. The rush up to the wedding and the worry about everything complicated about the move to Japan have had me on the verge of tears and hysteria for the last week. Then I get the bad news late last night that the tailor who made my dress, who had PROMISED it would be here either yesterday or today, didn't send it until last night. Le sigh Sent me into a crying mess of ick. Not quite Bridezilla, thankfully.

The birdcage headpiece I made for tomorrow.

Sure, I know it's just trappings and frills. But this was my Dream dress. When I got married the first time, I was young, impetuous and living in a fantasy world. My mom, who got married far too early (thanks to me), didn't get to have a large wedding so I agreed to just about everything she suggested for our wedding, only insisting on the colors I wanted. And it was gorgeous! Truly a beautiful ceremony and reception for 450 people. Yes, there really were that many invited. I don't begrudge her that at all. But the dress style of the time was poof, pearls and padding. I rivaled Lady Di in her regalia.

As I stated above, I'm nearing 40, I'm a woman who knows what she wants and I want the pared down classiness instead of the pomp and circumstance. Though what I had been planning for June WAS going to be fan-freaking-tastic! Maybe it's some selfishness. But a woman is entitled to want to look and feel her absolute best on her wedding day. The secondary dress we bought the other day isn't quite what I want but it'll do. Because tomorrow, I wed the Major, my best friend, my lover, the one person in this world who truly understands and loves me for all my flaws. He thinks I'm beautiful when I'm blubbering incoherently in my pajamas. So I'll make the most of tomorrow. I'll buy some amazing and colorful new shoegasms (because what outfit is complete without them?), see my family and many of our friends at dinner at a local Japanese restaurant and live and love.

That's what it's about. Year after year, getting older, wiser and happier. Yes, 38 will be the year of change and amazeballs discovery! Bring it on, Life!!

Major, Biggun and Bunny, I love you three with all my heart. Thank you for being in my life. 

Konnichiwaaaaa??

After the initial shock has been faced, and all our friends and family told the news of our impending move across the world, the stress has set in, but to a lesser degree. Granted, I've never lived anywhere but here in Oklahoma. Except that fun summer in the Allegheny Mountains at camp. But still. And the closest to being out of the country I've gone is  a week in Montreal for a conference and a few days in Barbados. Bless him, my husband at the time had the flu and that was supposed to be our honeymoon. I saw the ocean for the first time by myself while he languished in the humid hotel room with earaches and stuffy head.

This Italian/French honeymoon with the Major would have been the trip of a lifetime for me. Getting to finally seeing parts of the world I could usually only access thru the internet or by going thru his pictures. Now, I'm facing MOVING across the world. About 10,092 miles away, in fact. Away from my own family and friends. Of course, my boys have a bit of trepidation about it. They're gaining a stepdad plus face being in a new school again and trying to make new friends in a country where even the letters don't look familiar. I can understand that completely.

Not my kids but this reminds me of them.

I love my boys to pieces and would do anything for them. We had to think long and hard about getting married in the first place as this possibility of moving was there. Could I handle moving them? Could *they* handle it? New school, friends and way of life. And yet, they are strong little boys. Resilient and a bit willful, but absolute joys to be around. That's what makes it so hard for some people to let them go, to let them experience the wonders of the world, even at a tender age. I understand it. I really do. Only I'm lucky in that I get to experience it with them. I'm not a homebody. Never have been. I love having my roots somewhere and a place to go back to but I need to roam. The next few months will consist of lots of questions of and by my darling little ones, with some hard truths coming out on both sides. And I ache for them.

All I can do is pray to God for peace and understanding on either side of the coin and hope we all see what is truly good for them and not just for ourselves.

今日は, Alice. ワンダーランドへようこそ (Good day, Alice. Welcome to Wonderland.)

"Nothing is constant but change." - Heraclitus

Over the last two years, I thought the evolution of my life had changed me from a single celled organism to a complex, happy little cephalopod, shuffling along. In the next six months, I'm about to evolve again: into a wife, a stranger, a world traveler.

You see, Dec. 31, my love and my life proposed to me, surrounded by some of our friends and our kids (We wished it was all of them!) while we were in Taos. The landscape is beautiful, the snow plentiful and it was the start of an unexpected journey. I may be short and he may have Hobbit feet but what we didn't think of was the surprise Gandalf would deal us this past Friday.

We were just getting into a groove! The kids are doing extremely well in their new school, though they're both shy and don't quite know how to make friends. They're doing well in sports too. The Major was preparing to move to another squadron on base into a training position and life has been great. We had scheduled our wedding for June 22 with an Alice in Wonderland/Edwardian era themed wedding. I finally found my dream dress and had it ordered. Only the details of decorating and picking out the menu remained. Our wonderful friends were offering to help in various ways and we were looking forward to seeing some out of town family and friends all in our backyard. It would have been perfect.

Before the wedding, since the Major's son is graduating from the American University of Rome, we were also planning a "honeymoon" trip to see him with my kids. We're to be in Rome for a few days, then trek to EuroDisney for a few days and then leave the kids together in Rome while the Major and I went to Venice for a couple of days. The best trip in the world! Right? Everyone could be happy about seeing amazing places and we'd be together. I had started the passport process, thankfully.

After the wedding, I'd really learn what it was like being a military wife with access to healthcare and other things. I was already learning the lingo by doing lots of research and reading. And knowing what questions I could ask which would be answered. We'd be able to stay here for a couple more years at best and the world would be at ease.

Seems Uncle Sam and the Universe are conspiring.

In wonderful and scary ways. In six months, this will all drastically change and I'm praying it all works out for the best. For now, I'll leave you with the following to see what it is we'll actually be doing for the next three years.

We're moving to Kadena AB, Okinawa, Japan.

It's all too much to take in at once. We're pushing the wedding up to THIS SATURDAY with immediate family and a couple friends. We have to get paperwork started so that the kids and I are on the orders. Hoping to do a reception/going away/get rid of the booze because we can't take it with us party in May or June but as we don't know the exact order dates yet, that's hard to organize.

Check in regularly for updates as I plan to share the ups and downs (within reason). There are some delicate matters which will NOT be discussed in this or any other forum and I ask that mutual friends refrain from gossip and speculation, especially concerning the kids. All we ask is your patience and love.

Happy Birthday, Major Resident

It's November and I'm seeing friends list all the things they're thankful for each day on Facebook. If I did that, I'd be a mushy puddle of goo. I'm incredibly thankful, don't get me wrong. I have an amazing family, the best boyfriend in the universe, the best sons a woman could ask for, amazing friends and support systems and my health is good. I have a home, food and am in want for nothing. (Except coffee and chocolate. You can never have too much of those!) But I don't want to save all my thanks for just one month in a post a day.

Today, I'm most thankful for that boyfriend. Who knows where we're headed but this life we lead is fraught with twists and turns and I enjoy seeing the surprises down every curve. We've both been on extreme roll coasters in our lives and come out with the largest teddy at fair. Today, God granted him another birthday. I pray God will grant us another 44 years together, as we were missing so much time together.

I WAS able to sneak onto base with the help of two of his unit crew. Had a cake and cookies and a bunch of people signed a card. I want him to know that he DOES make a difference in the lives of those around him. It's not something he's use to, that's for sure. Throughout the day, I've had friends and family call the house and my cell with messages of good wishes and happiness for his day. ALso bought Avenue Q tix for this weekend. SO excited! I have a few more surprises up my sleeves but until the day is done, I can't reveal. He reads this blog. :)

Baby, you ain't seen nothing yet!

As I said on my own FB:

A few years ago, he showed me friendship. Time passed & it became compassion when my heart hurt the worst. A bit more time & I returned the favor. I couldn't imagine my life without him now, without the laughter & love. Happy Birthday to a most incredible man!